Thursday, January 22

i hate when people say "OMG i just had a blonde moment," but...

i had two today.

n u m b e r o n e :

spanish class. 10:20 AM. finals week.

our desks are spread out so we don't cheat, and mine was pushed all the way to the front wall, right in front of this handmade poster from a first grade class that says "Congratulations! You've been caught being KIND!"

little children have signed their names all around this phrase, and there is glitter and happy faces and stickers. it's a nightmare. i have to stare at it every day. i have spent many an hour analyzing each and every sloppy 6-year-old signature and being disgusted at the crowded nature of this poster. looking at it is my only option while "mean miller" (she calls herself that) gives us apuntes.

and i hate it. i despise that poster more than anything in this world. besides the devil.

and of course, my face has to be one foot away from it for two hours while i take my spanish final.

why does she even have the poster? she never taught first grade. what affiliations does she have with this gross poster? i should ask her. i should also ask her to take it down before i rip it down in anger.

so i was sharing my disgust with my pal sherwin, who sits next to me.
he thought the poster was "cute." please, give me a break.

i was telling him everything i hated about it...
and this was one of my sentences:
"seriously, look at it. the kids have the weirdest names. look, it says 'guadalu P.E.' who names their child that?"

he stared at me like i just said the stupidest thing in the world.
"are you kidding me? that says guadalupe."

i looked again...and realized that guadalupe had just put the P and the E in her name on another line because there was no room.

so we laughed and he called me the dumbest person he had ever met...which is true.

guadalu P.E., i hope i meet you some day.



n u m b e r t w o :

mcdonald's. 6:30 PM. dinnertime with the family.

we were looking at the menu, and jason asked what increments the chicken nuggets came in. i scanned the menu, sure that i could help him out. i found the nuggests on the menu, and saw the options right below him.

"oh, they come in 3, 5, 7, 6, 8, and 9," i informed him, confident in my answer.
they accepted it for a second, and then my mom was like "wait, where do you see that?"

"number fifteen," i replied boldly.

everyone just kept looking for where i was getting this nugget information, and then i thought to myself "oh, it must be that they come in odd numbers...but why is there an 8 piece? hm, that's a lot of number options..."

and then i realized that i was reading the price...$3.57 for a 5 piece and $6.89 for a 10 piece.

i. am. so. stupid.

4 comments:

kamini maya said...

I thought they were both funny, but I laughed out loud when I read the first one.

Katie said...

don't worry about that. i've been getting a lot of blond moments lately. hahahaha, i liked both of your blond moments! :)

Carrie said...

wow. I am friends with your sisters and visited your site to see your WF pictures, and read these stories with much amusement. I seriously laughed harder at these stories than I have in a long time. You are a great writer!

Ps, I took mean Miller in Spanish at THHS too... years ago!

Carrie said...

friends with your sisteR...