sometimes,

you just gotta go to McDonald's at 12 at night after having a cryfest as your best friend leaves for college. then after, you just gotta order a 50 piece chicken nuggets and split it with all your friends. then try to go back for ice cream but they're closed.

this is adulthood, people.

college is coming.

i'm not ready!

i have to read 2 books for the honors program before school starts,

buy all my dorm stuff and somehow create a coherent design that my hallmates will envy (very important),

bid farewell to all of my friends (my best friend since 3rd grade leaves tomorrow...what?),

quit my job,

pack up my life,

and move in.

and make new friends.

and balance the thousands of pages of reading i will be doing with hanging out with friends.

how will i do this?

uh...good question.

such a nice day.

I had a really bad night/morning and it was turned around after school when Melissa and Jessica took me to the beach. And we ate our feelings and they let me unload on them and comforted me but then just took my mind off of things for a few hours. Those are what I call good friends!

And also, last night when it was worse than ever I loved having someone to call and cry to. Haily I can’t thank you enough for making it all better. Love you.

God is good. All the time. All the time.

Senior awards banquets....

where I sit through two hours of a ceremony to be announced as receiving a scholarship i already know i received. SO FUN!

i only have three more days of classes. this is weirdtown.
summer, get at me.

Sentimental time--

I’m down to the last week and a half of high school. What in the world. Where did the year go? Where did high school go?

I am getting so SO sentimental as each day passes and everything has the word “last” in front of it. Last finals. Last full day of school. Last day aiding my Drama 1 kids. Last makeup test. Last sports rally. Last film banquet. Last week with the film class all together. AHHH it is so weird, because for a majority of this year I was completely detached from my school friends. I thought that they weren’t worth my time because they didn’t want the same things out of life that I did and weren’t going to call me during the summer to hang out. So I thought I’d just invest my time with my friends who I knew were going to stick around.

But recent events made me realize how dumb and self-righteous that decision was. Why didn’t I open myself up to them and love them for who they are? Why did I waste so many days isolating myself when I could have lived in the moment and enjoyed the people right inf front of me? My friends now know (I hope) that I am completely okay with who they are and the decisions they’re making, and they know I want to hang out with them. So it’s going to happen. And it’s going to be so much fun because the girls above have been my best friends since 3rd grade and it sucked losing them. SUCKED. But now I feel like I have at least one back, and I could not be more excited (Holla Melissa, I know you’re reading this) to spend my summer hanging out with her and the rest of my film friends. Because they are beautiful people who make me laugh and make me think. I feel a great summer coming my way, and a great first year of college.

I decided today that I miss rambling.

I miss cataloging my everyday life in paragraph and list form.
Yes, reblogging pictures with cool lighting is fun....but....I like this better.
Yes, there are more people I know on Tumblr now and I am unsure that anyone will read this....but....I don't care.
Yes, I have a lot I want to write about.
Join me.